Slow day

Something I keep thinking about at the moment is mediocrity. Or settling. As in the Postal Service song The Sound of Settling although I don't actually know what that song is about. When do people accept their lot? When do we stop striving? I guess familiy, careers etc come along and you lose sight of that vague, nebulous idea you had of actual fulfilment. Maybe it lingers on for some, an unrealised hint of what might have been. Something half-seen and shapeless that whispers: 'Is this what I wanted? Is this how I imagined?' I have never stopped wondering. I am just too afraid to actually seek as hard as I should. It's only now I feel I have a little more self-confidence that I have embraced change and relished challenges. But always there's a side of me which walks past nice houses with cars on the drive and thinks: 'That will do me, a lovely wife, kids on the way, bit of money.' But then I fast forward 20 years and I see a sad-eyed man staring out the window at me pondering how it came to this. I guess what it comes down to is being sure. Sure that you gave it your all at least. Sorry this is so brief, it's been a long day.